‘Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but
by the moments that take our breath away.’
 George Carlin

• Sayings That Make
  You Stop and Think
• Quotations from
  Old Sages
• Another Batch of Wisdom
  Sayings
• Top Ten Favourite Sayings
• Silly Things People Say That Probably Annoy You and Me

Sayings That Make You Stop
and Think

Any fool can tell the truth, but it requires a man of some sense to know how to lie well.
Samuel Butler

Facts are stubborn things, but statistics
are more pliable.
Mark Twain

Politeness, n. The most acceptable hypocrisy.
Ambrose Bierce

If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again. Then quit. No use being a
damn fool about it.
W.C. Fields

The price one pays for pursuing any profession or calling is an intimate knowledge of its ugly side.
James Baldwin

Quotations from Old Sages

Knowledge comes, but wisdom lingers.
Alfred Lord Tennyson

Art is science made
clear.
Jean Cocteau

The best way to become acquainted with a subject is to write a book about it.
Benjamin Disraeli

Politics is not the art of
the possible. It consists in choosing between the disastrous and the unpalatable. John Kenneth Galbraith

The ability to delude yourself may be an important survival tool.
Jane Wagner

Sayings That Make You Think

The follies which a man regrets most, in his life, are those
which he didn’t
commit when he had the opportunity. Helen Rowland

All things are difficult before they are easy.
Thomas Fuller

The least of learning is done in the classrooms.
Thomas Merton (So keep reading our jokes!)

Another Batch of Wisdom Sayings
From the
Famous

Remember that as a teenager you are at the last stage of your life when you will be happy to hear that the phone is for you.
Fran Lebowitz

You don’t
stop laughing because you grow old. You
grow old because you stop laughing.
Michael Pritchard

Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it.
George Santayana

Nothing is as simple as we hope it will be.
Jim Horning

No good deed goes unpunished.
Clare Booth Luce (also Oscar Wilde)

One man that has a mind and knows it can always beat ten men who haven’t and don’t.
George
Bernard Shaw

Nothing fixes a thing so intensely in the memory as the wish to forget it.
Michel de Montaigne

If you haven’t found something strange during the day, it hasn’t been much of a day.
John A. Wheeler

Will and Guy’s
Top
Ten Favourite Sayings That Make You Stop And Think

1. Man often becomes what he believes himself to be. If I keep on
   saying to myself that I cannot do a certain thing, it is possible that I
   may end by really becoming incapable of doing it. On the contrary, if I
   have the belief that I can do it, I shall surely acquire the capacity to
   do it even if I may not have it at the beginning.  Mahatma
   Gandhi
2. You can never cross the ocean unless you have the courage to lose
   sight of the shore.  Christopher Columbus
3. Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in
   overalls and looks like work.  Thomas A Edison
4. Champions aren’t made in gyms. Champions are made from something
   they have deep inside them a desire, a dream, a vision. They have to
   have the skill and the will. But the will must be stronger than the
   skill.  Muhammad Ali
5. So many of our dreams at first seems impossible, then they seem
   improbable, and then, when we summon the will, they soon become
   inevitable.  Christopher Reeve
6. Efficiency is doing things right.
   Effectiveness is doing the
   right things.  Peter Drucker
7. Formal education will make you a living. Self education will make
   you a fortune.  Jim Rohn
8. You must be the change you want to see in the world. 
   Mahatma Gandhi
9. Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path
   and leave a trail.  Waldo Emerson
10. It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought
    without [necessarily] accepting it.  Aristotle

Funny Valentine’s Day Sayings

• ‘When you fish for love, bait with your heart, not your brain’. Mark
  Twain
• A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
  A
  successful woman is one who can find such a man.
• My girlfriend told me that she was seeing another man.
  I
  told her to rub her eyes. Emo Philips
• See more
  Valentine sayings.

Silly
Things People Say That Probably Annoy You and Me

• People who point at their wrist while asking for the time.
• People who are willing to search the entire room for the TV remote
  because they refuse to get up and change the channel manually.
• People who say, ‘Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too’.
  Yes! What good is cake if you can’t eat it?
• People who say, ‘it’s always the last place you look’. Personally, I
  tend to stop looking once I’ve found it.
• When people watching a film say, ‘did you see that?’ What do they
  think I was watching?
• People who ask, ‘Can I ask you a question?’
• When something is “new and improved”. Which is it?
• When people say, ‘life is short’. Life is the longest thing anyone
  ever does. What can you do that’s longer?
• When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks, ‘Has the bus come
  yet?’
  If the bus had come would I be standing there?

Twelve More Wisdom Sayings

1. There are few things in this world more reassuring than an unhappy
   lottery winner.
   Tony Parsons.
2. I read the other day in a book by a fashionable novelist that ghosts
   went out when the electric light came in.  What nonsense.
   Edith Wharton
3. Sadness is almost never more than a form of fatigue.
   Andre Gide
4. We do on stage things that are supposed to happen off. Which is a
   kind of integrity, if you look on every exit as being an entrance
   somewhere else.
   Tom Stoppard
5. A problem well stated is a problem half solved.
   Charles
   Kettering.   (Keep re-defining a problem until it solves
   itself)
6. God gave man two ears, but only one mouth that he should hear twice
   as much as he speaks.
   Epictetus – Greek Philosopher.
7. The chief requirement of the good life is to live without any great
   image of oneself.
   Iris Murdoch.
8. Wealth is like seawater the more we drink, the thirstier we become
   and the same is true of fame.
   Arthur Schopenhauer.
9. Brigands demand your money or your life, women require both
   Samuel Butler.
10. There are no ugly women, only lazy ones
    Helena Rubenstein.
11. The best careers advice to give to the young is ‘Find out what you
    are good at and get someone to pay you for doing it’.
    Katherine
    Whitehorn.
12. Inspiration is the act of drawing up the chair to the writing desk.
    Anonymous.

Footnote:
Please send us your favourite wisdom
sayings.