How Being a Parent Can Change Your Life | Funny Examples

When a baby is born into a family it affects every one in that family.
However, as you have baby 2 … then baby 3, the way in which you deal with the child also changes considerably.  Read these suggested differences and enjoy a laugh with Will and Guy.

Your
Baby’s Clothing:

1st baby:
You begin wearing maternity clothes as soon as your pregnancy is confirmed.

2nd baby: You wear your ordinary clothes for as long as you are able.

3rd baby: Your maternity clothes are your ordinary clothes.

Getting Ready for the Day of the Birth:

1st baby: You practice your breathing as often as possible

2nd baby: You don’t
bother practicing your breathing because you remember that last time,
breathing didn’t
help at all.

3rd baby: You accept an epidural injection as soon as it is offered.

See more advice on getting ready for the birth.

Major
Concerns for Being a Parent:

1st baby: At the first sign of upset, the slightest cry you pick up the baby for a cuddle.

2nd baby: You
pick the baby up when her cries threaten to wake your neighbours.

3rd baby: You teach your 2 year-old how to rewind the mechanical swing.

Dummies*:

1st baby: If the dummy falls on the
floor you put it away until you can go home and disinfect it properly.

2nd baby: When the dummy falls on the floor you squirt it off with some juice from the baby’s
bottle.

3rd baby: You
wipe it off on your shirt and pop it back in.

Note* In the USA they would call this dummy a ‘binky’.

Buying a Layette**:

1st baby: You wash the clothes before organising them into colour
coordinated folded piles neatly laid out in the baby’s
specially bought chest of drawers.

2nd baby: You make sure that the clothes are clean and throw only the ones with the dirtiest marks on them.

3rd
baby: You are heard to say that boys can wear pink, no problem.

Note** Layette means all the clothes you need for a baby.  Vests, cardigan, babygro all-in-ones and even bonnets.

Nappies: [Diapers in the USA]

1st baby: You change your baby’s
nappy every hour whether they need it or not.

2nd baby: You change their
nappy every 2 to 3 hours, if required.

3rd baby: You change their nappy when others start to complain about the smell.

What
Activities Do You Do with Your
Youngster?

1st baby: You take your child to the Clinic, the Gym, the swimming pool and the Library for story time.

2nd baby: You take your youngster to the Clinic.

3rd baby: You take your
child to Asda/Walmart.

Baby
Sitters:

1st baby: The first time you leave your baby with a sitter you call home 4 times.

2nd baby: Just before you walk out the door, you remember to
leave a number where you can be reached.

3rd baby: You leave instructions for the sitter to call only if she sees blood.

How You React When at Home With the Baby:

1st baby: You spend a
great deal of time every day just gazing lovingly at your baby.

2nd baby: You spend some of everyday keeping an eye open to ensure that your eldest child isn’t
squeezing, poking or hurting the baby.

3rd
baby: You spend some of every day hiding from the children.

Footnote:
Please send us your advice on being a
parent!