Short Jokes for Friday
- A Friday Funny Story
- Friday's Goddess - Freya
- Friday 13th Jokes
- Friday Accidents
- Loser of the Week
- Is it Friday Yet?
- Murphy's Law - Always strikes on a Friday
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∇Droll and Quirky Jokes for Friday
A Friday Funny Story
Roger left for work on Friday morning. Friday was payday, so instead of going home, he stayed out the entire weekend partying with the boys and spending his entire pay packet. Finally, Roger appeared at home on Sunday night, and obviously he was confronted by his angry wife, Martha who castigated Roger for nearly two hours with a tirade befitting his actions. Finally, Martha stopped the nagging and said to Roger, 'How would you like it if you didn't see me for two or three days?' Roger replied grimly, 'That would be fine with me.' Monday went by and he didn't see his Martha. Tuesday and Wednesday came and went with the same results. By the Thursday, the swelling had gone down just enough so that Roger he could see Martha a little out of the corner of his left eyeFunny Fishing Affair
'Do you really believe your husband when he tells you he goes fishing every weekend?' Asks Vicky's best friend, Myra. 'Why shouldn't I, Myra?' responds Vicky. 'Well, maybe he is having an affair?' comments Myra. 'No way,' laughs Vicky, 'he never comes home with any fish.' A legend believed by many fishermen is:
'A Friday's sail,
always fail.'
Droll Traffic Cop 
One Friday a traffic policeman stops a Maisie and asks to see her driving licence. 'Lady, it says here that you should be wearing glasses when driving.'
'Well,' replies Maisie, 'I have contacts.' 'Lady, I don't care who you know, you're still going to get a ticket.'Amusing Examination 
Father: Son, what are your results in the end of term examination?
Son: Underwater. Father: What do you mean, underwater?
Son: Below "C" level. Cartoon by StuQuirky Doctor
Doctor, doctor, I feel like a 10 Dollar note. Well go and buy something then, the change will do you good.
Is it Friday Yet?
'Things to Say When Caught Asleep On a Friday Afternoon'
- They told me at the blood bank this might happen.
- I wasn't sleeping, I was trying to pick up contact lens without hands.
- I wasn't sleeping, I was meditating on the mission statement and envisioning a new paradigm.Amen
- This is just a 15 minute power-nap like they raved about in the last time management course you sent me to.
- I was doing a highly specific Yoga exercise to relieve work related stress.
- Hey, that cold medicine I took last night just won't wear off.
- Why did you interrupt me? I had almost figured out a solution to our biggest problem.
Cartoon by Bennett
Friday's Goddess - Freya
Odin's
wife was called Frigg (Freya). If you accept the Norse origins of the other days, then Fri day becomes a realistic derivation.
Interestingly, the Romans also saw this day as female, as they named it after their goddess Venus. This Latin root remains in the French for Friday, Vendredi. You will often see her wearing a robe of feathers, which enabled
her to fly through the air like a bird.Good Deal for a Modern Freya
Freya was driving her Chevrolet Vega home in New Mexico when she saw an elderly Apache woman walking along the side of the road. She stopped the car and asked the woman if she would like a lift? With a silent nod, the woman climbed into the car. Freya tried in vain to make conversation with the Apache woman. The old Apache looked closely at everything she saw, studying every little detail, until she noticed a red gift bag on the seat next to Freya. 'What's in the bag?' asked the old woman. 'It's a bottle of gin that I got for my husband.' The Apache woman was silent for another minute or two. Then speaking with the quiet wisdom of an elder, she said, 'Good trade.'More Friday Jokes
Don't Mess With the Elderly
Myra Rhodes, a little old lady living in Great Baddow, Essex, answered a knock on the door one Friday, to be confronted by a well-dressed young man carrying a vacuum cleaner. 'Good morning, Ma'am,' said the young man. 'If I could take a couple minutes of your time, I would like to demonstrate the very latest in high-powered vacuum cleaners.' 'Go away!' said Myra brusquely. 'I'm broke and haven't got any money,' and she proceeded to close the door. Quick as a flash, the young man wedged his foot in the door and pushed it wide open. 'Don't be too hasty,' he commanded. 'Not until you have at least seen my demonstration.' And with that, he emptied a bucket of horse manure onto her hallway carpet. 'Now, if this vacuum cleaner does not remove all traces of this horse manure from your carpet, Madam, I will personally eat the remainder.' Myra stepped back and said with a smile, 'Well let me get you a spoon, young man because they cut off my electricity this morning.'Friday Afternoon At the Building Site

Famous Fridays
- Good Friday - Easter.
- Black Friday - Follows Thanksgiving.
- Man Friday - Robinson Crusoe.
- 'Solah Shukravar Vrats' fasting for 16 consecutive Fridays.
Friday's child is loving and giving.
Weekend Tall Story
At a weekend convention of biological scientists, Hannah, a researcher remarks to Pam, 'Did you know that in our lab we have switched from mice to lawyers for our experiments?' 'Really?' Pam replies, 'Why did you switch?' 'Well, for two reasons. First we found that lawyers are far more plentiful, and second, the lab assistants don't get so attached to them,' chortled Hannah.Friday 13th Superstitions
- It is bad luck to fall out of a thirteenth story window on Friday. American Proverb
- Do you believe that getting married on a Friday brings bad luck ?Of course, why would Friday be an exception? Anon
- A legend believed by many fishermen is: 'A Friday's sail, always fail.'
- See more Friday 13th Superstitions.