Examples of mistakes made by Jerry builders and other 'professional' workmen.
Incidentally, the term Jerry Built dates back to the 19th century. The
original meaning was defective, made from makeshift materials.
- Russian Jerry Builder -
- Mind the step
- Designed by
Jobsworths, Built by Jerry Builders
- Not Jerry Built -
Just Weird Cubic Houses
- DIY (Dangerous Incompetent
Russian Jerry Builder - Windows
Look closely at these replacement windows which are to be found, supposedly,
Example of a Jerry Builder with a Squint
Bad Case of D.I.Y.
I've been charged with murder for killing a man with sandpaper. To be
honest I only intended to rough him up a bit.
Mind the Step
A classic bodge job. Note the chair, a give-away that this room is
actually in use
A New Development
Jobsworths, Built by Jerry Builders
Each of these errors would be hard to believe except we have the
photographs. Will and Guy are amazed that the builders did not question
We Give This Jerry builder 8/10 for Plastering, But 0/10 for Planning.
Stairway to Heaven?
Stairway to Hell?
Deluxe Jerry Built Balcony
Standard Balcony - With Lighting
Jerry Builder Cashing Out, or Cashing In?
How much money do I want?
How much do I want money!
Question for Builders:
Why does a
builder have a transparent
So that he can tell if he is going to work or coming home.
Not Jerry Built - Just
Weird Cubic Houses
These cubic houses came about from a design by Piet Blom in Rotterdam,
Netherlands. The concept is of a a forest, thus to get the full effect you
need to view a street of these cubic houses. (See photograph to the right)
The cubes are split into three levels. The triangle-shaped lower level contains
the living area. The windows on this level open onto the environment below due
to the slope of the tilted cube. The middle level contains the sleeping area and
a bathroom, while the top triangle becomes an extra bedroom or a living space.
The columns holding up the cubes allow for a staircase that leads to the
entrance. Some of the cubes in the 'forest' have shops on the
Meanwhile, Back with the Jerry Builders
DIY (Dangerous Incompetent Yob)
A Do-it-Yourself [DIY] enthusiast, from the UK, has been banned by his wife
from taking on any more tasks after causing thousands of pounds worth of damage
reports the Daily Telegraph newspaper.
Christopher Andrews, 21, a pensions administrator, has left a trail of
destruction in their two-bedroom terrace house in Wiltshire, south-west England.
While trying to change a washer on a tap, he went up into the loft to look for
the stop-crock and disconnected two pipes, flooding the house. He later returned
to the loft to look for the television aerial and crashed through the room's ceiling,
showering plaster on his wife who was ironing.
When he wanted to lay a carpet in the bedroom, he knocked out the light
bringing the roll of material into the house. He cut a large hole in the carpet
rather than move the bed. Andrews once blacked both his eyes when a wheel brace
slipped as he tried to change a punctured tyre on the couple's car.
Mr Mr Andrews ruined a kitchen work surface by trimming off so much of it to
make it fit that it ended up far too small.
In his hands the electric drill becomes a dangerous weapon. He cut his leg
badly when he dropped the drill as he tried to re-hang a broken garden gate.
Then, while trying to put up a coat rack in the hall, he drilled through an
electric cable sending out sparks that set fire to the curtains.
This made him more safety conscious; so when he decided to put some speakers
on the walls he turned off the electricity. Then, unable to understand why his
electric drill had stopped working, he took it apart to see if he could fix the
fault. Having failed to find anything wrong with it, he tried to put it back
together again but by then he had forgotten where all the pieces went. He went
out and bought another drill and was about to take it back because it didn't
work when his wife arrived home and reminded him that he had turned off the
Mrs Andrews, a job training manager, said she had had enough, 'Chris will
have a go at absolutely anything,' she commented. 'But in his case DIY stands
for Dangerously Incompetent Yob'.
It is entirely possible, think Will and Guy, that Mr Andrews may have been
responsible for fitting this television in his home.
A family bought a house and made plans for interior decorations. They
decided to wallpaper the walls.
"The neighbors' house is the same size as ours," the wife said to the
husband, "and they wallpapered their walls. Go over there and ask them how
many rolls of wallpaper they bought."
The husband went next door, returned and reported, "They bought 12
rolls." So the husband and wife went to the store and also bought 12 rolls
along with some other supplies. Later that day they began the job of
When they finished, they still had 4 rolls left.
Looking at the leftover rolls, the husband said, "I'm going next door and
ask the neighbors about this." He went next door.
"You said you bought 12 rolls of wallpaper to paper your walls," the
husband said when his neighbor answered the door.
"We did buy 12 rolls," the neighbor replied.
"We bought 12 as well," the husband said. "but we still have 4 rolls
"Yeah," the neighbor replied, "We still have 4 rolls left too!"
See also Funny Follies »
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Loser week •
Funny loser of the week •
Loser month •
American jobsworth •
Stupid boy •
Bad luck superstitions •
Prison or work? Difference? •
Jerry Builders •
Funny folly houses •
Murphy's Law •