Tech Support Jokes

Give Microsoft a chance

Customer: 'I'm having trouble installing Microsoft Word.' Tech Support: 'Tell me what You've done.' Customer: 'I typed A:SETUP.' Tech Support: 'Ma' am, remove the disk and tell me what it says.' Customer: 'It says [PC manufacturer] Restore and Recovery disk'. Tech Support: 'Insert the MS Word setup disk.'  Customer: 'What?' Tech Support: 'Did you buy Microsoft Word?' Customer: 'No...'

Change of Mind

Customer: I keep getting inappropriate pop-ups on my computer and don't want my wife to think that it's me.' Advisor: 'I will remove them for you.' Customer: 'How do I get them back when she is not in?'

Dial Tone

Tech Support: 'Thank you for calling. May I have your phone number beginning with area code first, please?' There was a pregnant pause, then a series of touch tones. Tech Support: 'Hello? I need your phone number, please'. More touch tones. Tech Support: 'Hi, can you hear me?' Customer: 'Yes.' Tech Support: 'Great, then can you please tell me your phone number so I can pull up your file?' More touch tones. Tech Support: 'Sir, what's your name?' Customer: Malcolm Tech Support: 'Great, now can you tell me your phone number?' Touch tones again. Tech Support: 'Please, tell me your phone number.' Customer: 'Again?' Tech Support: 'Yes sir, if you don't mind, but can you please just tell me verbally?' Touch tones yet again. Tech Support: 'Sir, contrary to popular opinion, support is not half machine. I'll need you to verbally tell me your phone number with your mouth so I can bring up your account info, got it?' Customer: 'You people are rude as well as incompetent.'

First Email

Tech support: How may I help you? Customer: I'm writing my first e-mail. Tech support: OK, and what seems to be the problem? Customer: Well, I have the letter 'a' in the address, but how do I get the circle around it?
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