- Martha and the Whale
- Know your Apples
- God Knows?
- Boot on the wrong foot
- Job for the Boys?
- Funny Teacher Stories - Actual Exam Answers
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∇Martha and the Whale
A little girl called Martha was talking to her teacher about whales. The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a
human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very
small. Martha stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale. Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human;
it was physically impossible. The little girl said, 'When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah'. The teacher asked, 'What if Jonah went to hell?' Martha replied, 'Then you ask him'.Know Your Apples - Out of the Mouth of Babes

God Knows?

More Funny Teacher Stories
Boot on the Wrong Foot?
This tale is based on a true story told to Will by a friend [Tessa] who is an nursery schoolteacher in Drayton near Portsmouth; names have been changed to protect the guilty.

Job for the Boys?
Will and Guy were once members of the teaching profession and we have found this amusing quote in the 'Handbook on Health and Safety' published by a British Teachers' Union: 'Every school should have a H&S rep. There are laws that protect their status, they are allowed time to train and perform their duties, and they can close an unsafe school! If you are interested in doing this please contact the regional centre.' Will and Guy believe that several pupils have applied for this post!Funny Teacher Stories - Actual Exam Answers

Question: What was Sir Walter Raleigh famous for? Answer: He is a noted figure in history because he invented cigarettes and started a craze for bicycles.

Question: Where was Hadrian's Wall built? Answer: Around Hadrian's garden
Question: What is a vibration? Answer: There are good vibrations and bad vibrations. Good vibrations were discovered in the 1960s.

Question: Give a reason why people would want to live near a power lines? Answer: To get electricity faster. [That said, can you think of one good reason?!]
Question: What is the meaning of "Varicose" Answer: Nearby
Question: Name one of the Roman's greatest achievements. Answer: To learn Latin.

