Blonde jokes are worthy of a thesis on sexist jokes. As far and Will
and Guy are concerned they were the first genre to make us think, 'Is this
really funny', should we publish blonde jokes? Indeed for a while we
pulled all these dumb women jokes.
Three things happened to make us change our mind, occassionally dumb blonde
jokes can be funny, then we discovered smart blonde jokes. Finally, there is
the realization that in Western cultures women can now look after themselves
We have lots of dumb men jokes, so why not a few good dumb women jokes.
Smart Blonde Joke
A blonde walks into a bank in New York City and asks for the Loan
officer. She says she's going to Europe on business for two weeks and needs
to borrow $5,000.
The bank officer says the bank will have to have some kind of security
for the loan, so the blonde hands over the keys to a new Porsche 911
The car is parked on the street in front of the bank, she has the title
and everything checks out. The bank agrees to accept the car as collateral
for the loan.
The bank's president and its officers all enjoy a good laugh at the blond
for using a $120,000 Porche as collateral against a $5,000 loan.
An employee of the bank then proceeds to drive the Benz into the bank's
underground garage and parks it there. Two weeks later, the blonde returns,
repays the $5,000 and the interest, which comes to $14.27.
The loan officer says, "Miss, we are very happy to have had your
business, and this transaction has worked out very nicely, but we are a
little puzzled. While you were away, we checked you out and found that you
are a multimillionaire.
What puzzles us is, why would you bother to borrow $5,000?"
The blonde replies, "Where else in New York City can I park my Car for
two weeks for only $14.27 and expect it to be there when I return?"
Dumb Blonde Joke
A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead show up for the same job interview. The brunette is the
first one to go in, and after filling out the forms and going through the questions, the interviewer decides to ask her last question: 'How many D's
are there in '
? The brunette thinks for a second and responds '
The interviewer sends her back with a promise that he'll get back to her after interviewing the remaining candidates.
The redhead is next. The process goes about the same, and at the
end: 'How many D's
are there in INDIANA JONES'
? She immediately says '
. The interviewer says, 'OK, we'll let you know'.
Then the blonde comes into the room, goes through the questions, and finally gets asked: 'How many
are there in INDIANA JONES'
. She gets a very serious look on her face and starts counting her fingers, muttering: '2, 4, 6 ...., hmmm - wait,... 2,
4, 6 .... can I borrow your calculator please?'
After going through 15 minutes of intense
calculating, she finally comes up with the answer: 'Thirty two'
The interviewer is stunned
and asks her: 'Ok, now tell me, how the hell did you arrive at this answer?'
To hear her
response to the question: 'How many D's
are in Indiana Jones?'
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One of Guy's
few disappoints in life is not being able to play a musical instrument. This musical void has extended to IT, I have always found wav, midi and woofers a complete mystery. In fact
research has pushed me into this is first venture into embedding .wav files.
Q: Why was the blonde so pleased when she completed her jigsaw puzzle
in only 3 months?
A: Because on the box it said: From 3-5 years.
Q: Why are blonde jokes short?
A: So that men can understand them!
The Blonde and The Mattress
A blonde woman driver ran over a mattress on I26 near Charleston. She
decided not to worry and just kept on driving 80 miles to Lexington.
What happened was the mattress entwined around the driveshaft as it
caught on the underside of her truck.
In fact the only thing that stopped her was that she ran out of petrol.
The springs from the mattress had torn a hole in her tank.
"Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the
world, I can't help but cry. I mean I'd love to be skinny like that, but
not with all those flies and death and stuff." - Mariah Carey
"Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part
of your life," - Brooke Shields.
During an interview to become spokesperson for federal anti-smoking
Please send us your SMART
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