Golfer: Golf is a funny game Caddy: Aye, but its not meant to be.
Way of Keeping of the Grass!
Guy thinks he should take an iron and not a driver. Will thinks he is on the ladies
Ralph was a smooth operator, and at Southwick Golf Club's annual dance he
attached himself to the prettiest lady golfer in the room and began boasting
to her. 'You know,' smarmed Ralph, 'they're all afraid to play me. What do you
think my handicap is?' 'Well, where do you want me to start, Ralph ?' Came her quick
Golf and Beer?
Take a good look at this picture then read the paragraph underneath. A man was walking down the street when he was accosted by a particularly
dirty and shabby-looking homeless man (see above) who asked him for a couple of dollars for dinner. The man took out his wallet, extracted ten dollars and asked, 'If I give you this money, will you buy
some beer with it instead of dinner?'
No, I had to stop drinking years ago, 'the homeless man replied. 'Will you use it to go fishing instead of buying food?'
the man asked.'
No, I don't
fishing, 'the homeless man said. 'I need to spend all my time trying to stay alive.' 'Will you spend this on greens fees at a golf course instead of food?'
the man asked. 'Are you NUTS!'
homeless man. 'I haven't played golf in 20 years!' 'Will you spend the money on a woman in the red light district instead of food?'
the man asked.'
What disease would I get for ten lousy bucks?'
exclaimed the homeless man. 'Well, 'said the man, 'I'm not going to give you the money. Instead, I'm going to take you home for a terrific dinner cooked by my wife.'
The homeless man was astounded.'
Won't your wife be furious with you for doing that? I know I'm dirty, and I probably smell pretty disgusting.' The man replied, 'That's okay. It's important for her to see what a man looks like after he has given up beer, fishing, golf, and
women.' See more funny fishy
More Funny Golfing Pictures
Who's For a Game of Golf? ... And a
Drink and drive golf range Will's only complaint is that the golf drink should be Bell's whisky.
If you drink, don't drive. Don't even putt. - Dean Martin
Golf Lessons ABC
A) Stephanie Clarke was taking her first golfing lesson.
'Is the word spelt p-u-t or p-u-t-t?'
she asked her instructor.
'P-u-t-t is correct,'
he replied. 'Put means to place a thing where you
want it. Putt means merely a vain attempt to do the same thing.'
B) Now', said the golf pro, 'suppose you just go through the motions without hitting the ball.' 'But that's
precisely the difficulty I'm
trying to overcome', said Stephanie. C) The only problem with golf is that the slow people are always in front of you and the fast people always end up behind you.
Another Batch of Amusing Golf Photos
Play Golf Free
Play golf FREE - While having your suit pressed. Dave Barry Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight
Protestants, today it's open to anybody who owns hideous clothing.
Golf Is Art
A Hare Interrupts US Ryder Cup Golfers
I'm a hare. Which one of you golfers is the rabbit? See more Funny golf Jokes here Please send Will and Guy your funny golf pictures.