Funny Golf Club Phone Calls

It is hard to believe that these phone calls have been made by people
who actually PLAY golf.  We think that the callers should already know the
answers. What do you think?

Club Staff: Golf course, may I help you?
Caller: What are your green
fees?
Club Staff: 38 dollars.
Caller: Does that include golf?

Receptionist: Golf course, may I help you?
Caller: Yes, I need to get
some information from you. First, is this your correct phone number?

Staff: Golf course, may I help you?
Golfer:
Yes, we have a tee time
for two weeks from Friday. What’s the weather going to be like that day?

Receptionist: Golf course, may I help you?
Caller: Yes, I
had a tee time for this afternoon but I’m running late. Can you still get me
out early?

Staff: Golf course, may I help you?
Caller: Yes, do you have one of
those areas where you can buy a bucket of golf balls and hit them for
practice?
Staff: You mean a driving range?
Caller: No, that’s not
it.

Receptionist: Golf course, may I help you?

Golfer: Yes, I’d like to get a
tee time tomorrow between 12 o’clock and noon.
Receptionist: Between 12 o’clock
and noon?
Golfer Yes.

Receptionist: We’ll try to squeeze you in.

Staff: Golf course, may I help you?
Caller: Do you have any open tee
times around 10 o’clock?
Staff: Yes, we have one at 10:15.
Caller:
What’s the next time after that?
Staff: We have one at 10:22.
Caller: We’ll take that one. It will be a bit warmer.

Strange how one joke reminds you of another, see
funny phone calls to
tech support.

More Funny Golf Phone Calls

Staff: Golf course, may I help you?
Caller: How much to play golf
today?
Staff: 25 to walk, 38 with a cart.
Caller: 38 dollars?
Staff: No, 38 wampum.

Receptionist: Golf course, may I help you?
Caller: What do you have for tee
times tomorrow?
Receptionist: What time would you like?
Caller: What times
do you have?
Receptionist: What time of the day?
Caller: Any time.
Receptionist: Morning or afternoon?
Caller: Whenever.

Receptionist: We have 16
times open in the morning and 20 open in the afternoon. Would you like me to
read the whole list?
Caller: No, I don’t think any of those times will
work for me.

Staff: Golf course, may I help you?
Caller: My kids just came home
with pockets full of range balls and said they stole them from your driving
range. Would you like to buy them back?

Caller: Do you have a dress code?

Club Staff: Yes, we do. We require soft spikes.
Caller: How about
clothes?
Club Staff: Yes, you have to wear clothes.

Staff: Golf course, may I help you?
Caller: Yes, do you have a
driving range there?
Staff: Yes.
Caller: How much for a bucket of
large balls?
Staff: Sorry, we’re all out of large balls. But we can give
you twice as many small balls for the same price.

Staff: Golf course, may I help you?
Caller: Can I get a tee time for
tomorrow?
Staff: Sure, what time would you like?
Caller: Something
between 9 o’clock and 10 o’clock. In the morning, if possible.

Another Batch of Amusing Phone Calls to Golf Clubs

Staff: Golf course, may I help you?
Caller: Do you rent golf clubs
there?
Staff: Yes, they’re 25 dollars.
Caller: How much to rent a
bag?

Club Staff: Golf course, may I help you?
Caller: Yes, my husband just
called me on his cell phone and told me he’s on the 15th hole. How many more
holes does he have to play before he gets to the 18th?

Staff: Golf course, may I help you?
Caller: Yes, do you have a
driving range there?
Staff: Yes.
Caller: How much for a large
bucket?
Staff: Four dollars.
Caller: Does that include the balls?

Receptionist: Golf course, may I help you?
Caller: Do you have a twilight
rate?
Receptionist: Yes, it’s 15 dollars after 2 o’clock.
Caller: And what
time does that start?

Staff: Golf course, may I help you?
Caller: Yes, I’d like some info
about your golf course.
Staff: OK, what would you like to know?
Caller: I don’t know, that’s why I called.

More funny
phone calls

Please send Will and Guy your favourite clean golf joke.