In this section we feature football
jokes, quotes and strange but true stories.
The flea can jump 350 times its body length. It's
like a human jumping the length of a football field.
The word soccer is derived from an abbreviation of association as in - Association Football. In 1890 it was spelt variously as socca and socker. One day Charles Wreford-Brown was leaving
his digs, dressed in sporting togs, when his friend enquired '
where are you off?'
I'm off to play football'
'Association or Rugger'
the friend asked. 'Why Soccer of course'
said Charles Wreford-Brown as jogged off to the game.
Bear in mind that in this era upper class sportsman had a fad of
to everything. Rugby became rugger and socca became soccer. Incidentally, my favourite example of this patois is Pragger Wagger, a slang word for the Prince of Wales (Later Edward VII).
Here are examples from our football pages
I've had 14 bookings this season - 8 of which were my
fault, but 9 of which were disputable. '
'I can see the carrot at the end of the tunnel. '
I'd like to play for an Italian
club, like Barcelona. '
If you don't
concede any goals you'
ll win more games than you lose. '
I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body'
See more players Quotes
Franz Beckenbauer = The Kaiser (Led West Germany and Bayern Munich to many triumphs. A skilful and thoughtful player)
Stuart Pearce =
Psycho (Would run through a brick wall for his team)
See more nicknames
Commentary to look out for:
He dribbles a lot and the opposition don't
like it - you can see it all over their faces'
- Ron Atkinson
- When Ian Rush transferred from Chester to Liverpool he said, 'It was like moving to a foreign country'
. People only took notice of Ian's
views when he said a similar thing after he moved from
Liverpool to Juventus. 'I could not settle, it was like being in a foreign country'
Hodge scored for Forest after 22 seconds - totally against the run of play'
What will you do when you leave football, Jack - will you stay in football?'
STUART HALL, Radio 5 Live
See more Football stories and jokes:
2014 World Cup jokes •
Footballer nicknames •
Football bloopers •
Funny footballer quotes
• Funny jokes
about football •
Funny football pictures •
Funny football stories
• Funny World Cup
Funny Super Bowl jokes
• Funny football photos