Contents
A Son's
Letter to his Father
Dear Dad
It is with a heavy heart that I
write this letter.
I decided to elope with my new girlfriend Tamara. We wanted to avoid a scene with you and Mum.
I've found real passion with Tamara and she is so lovely - even with her
nose piercing, tattoos, and her tight motorcycle clothes. But it's
not only the joy Dad, she's
pregnant and Tamara said that we will be very happy.
Even though you won't
care for her as she is so much
older than me, she already owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. She wants to have many more children with me and that's
now one of my dreams too.
Tamara taught
me that marijuana doesn't
really hurt anyone, and we'll be growing it for us and trading it with her friends for all the cocaine and ecstasy we want. In the meantime, we'll pray that science will find a
cure for HIV so that Tamara can get better; she sure deserves it!
Don't
worry Dad, I'm 15 years old now and I know how to take care of myself. Someday I'm sure we'll be back to visit, so you can get to
know your grandchildren
Your ever loving son,
Eddie.
PS: Don't
worry Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at the next door's
house. I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than
my end of year school report which is in the centre drawer of my desk. I love you!
Call when it is safe for me to come home.
Son's Letter from his Boarding School
Dear Dad,
$chool i$ really great. I am making lot$ of friend$ and $tudying very
hard.
With all my $tuff, I $imply can't think of anything I need.
$o if you would like, you can ju$t $end me a card, a$ I would love to hear from you.
Love,
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Dad's Reply
Dear Peter,
I kNOw that astroNOmy, ecoNOmics, and oceaNOgraphy are eNOugh to keep even an hoNOr student busy.
Do NOt forget that the pursuit of kNOwledge
is a NOble task, and you can never study eNOugh.
Love,
Dad.
Letter from
Prodigal Son?
Dear folks,
I feel miserable because I have to keep writing for money. I feel ashamed and unhappy to have to ask for another hundred, but every cell in my body rebels. I
beg on bended knee that you forgive me.
Your son, Marvin.
P.S. I felt so terrible I ran after the mailman who picked this up in the box at the corner. I wanted to take this letter and burn it. I prayed
that I could get it back. But it was too late.
Reply
A few days later Marvin received a letter from his father. It said, 'Your prayers were answered. Your letter never came!'
Footnote:
Please send us your father and son letters.
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