Rabbit Stories

A Classic Rabbit Yarn by Pauline Henderson

A rabbit walks into a pub and says to the barman, 'Can I have a pint of beer and a ham and cheese toastie?'
The barman is
amazed but gives the rabbit a pint of beer and a ham and cheese toastie. The rabbit drinks the beer and eats the toastie, he then leaves.

The following night the rabbit returns and again asks for a
pint of beer and a ham and cheese toastie. The barman, now intrigued by the rabbit and the extra drinkers in the pub (because word gets round) gives the rabbit the pint and the toastie. The rabbit
consumes them and leaves.

The next night, the pub is packed, in walks the rabbit and says, 'A pint of beer and a ham and cheese toastie, please barman.'
The crowd is hushed as the barman gives the rabbit his pint and toastie and then burst into applause as the rabbit wolfs them down.

The next night there is standing room only in the pub, coaches have been laid on for the crowds of patrons attending,
the barman is making more money in one week than he did all last year. In walks the rabbit and says, 'A pint of beer and a ham and cheese toastie, please barman, 'smiling and accepting the tributes of
the masses. The barman says, 'I'm sorry rabbit, old mate, old mucker but we are right out of them ham and cheese toasties'
. The rabbit looks aghast, the crowd has quietened to almost a whisper, when
the barman clears his throat nervously and says, 'We do have a very nice Cheese and Onion Toastie.'
The rabbit looks him in the eye and says, 'Are you sure I will like it?'
The masses bated breath is ear shatteringly silent. The barman, with a roguish smile says, 'Do you think that I would let down one of my best friends, I know you'll love it.'
Ok, 'says the rabbit, 'I'll have a pint of beer and a cheese
and onion toastie'. The pub erupts with glee as the rabbit quaffs the beer and guzzles the toastie, he then waves to the crowd and leaves.... .....

NEVER TO RETURN

One year later in the now
impoverished public house, the barman (who has only served 4 drinks tonight, 3 of which were his) calls time. When he is cleaning down the now empty bar, he sees a small white form, floating above the
bar. The barman says, 'Who are you?'
To which he is answered, 'I am the ghost of the rabbit that used to frequent your public house.'
The barman says, 'I remember you, you made me famous, you would come
in every night and have a pint of beer and a ham and cheese toastie, masses came to see you and this place was famous.'
The rabbit says, 'Yes I know.'
The barman said, 'I remember, on your last night
we didn't
have any ham and cheese toasties, you had a cheese and onion one instead.'
The rabbit said, 'Yes, you promised me that I would love it'
. The barman said, 'You never came back, what
happened?'I DIED'
, said the rabbit.'
NO!'
said the barman, 'what from?'
After a short pause,the rabbit said......................................................

'
Mixin'
-me-toasties'

Mad as a March hare - say Will and Guy

The White Rabbit Marries Alice

A Love Story from Cornwall, England

Jane and Mark Sharp-Hall's wedding was so very different since they and
their guests all dressed up as characters from the novel 'Alice's Adventures
in Wonderland' (commonly shortened to 'Alice in Wonderland').

Alice and the White Rabbit

They were married dressed as Alice and the White Rabbit from * Carroll's
1865 novel, while the best man came as the Mad Hatter and other guests
played the Queen of Hearts, Cheshire Cat, Caterpillar and 28 playing cards.

'This is the second time round for both of us and we did it traditionally
the last time so we thought we'd do everything a bit differently this time,'
said Mrs Sharp-Hall, who spent more than a year creating the costumes.

* Alias of English author Charles Lutwidge Dodgson

The couple married underground at Poldark Mine in Cornwall, where they
also enjoyed a Mad Hatter-inspired tea party - including little 'Eat
Me'cakes.

Footnote:
Please send us your rabbit yarns.