Will and Guy's Collection of Police Humour
- Police Car Stuck in Concrete
- This Picture Shows an Even Unluckier Police car
- Police Car Stolen
- For Police Who Distrust Cars
- Police Slow
- Young police officer in need of a drink?
- Funny Police Car? Or New Police Chariot!
- Funny Police Pics - Live Alligator in Car
- Win a Free Ride in a Police Car
We have heard of laws been set in concrete - but never police cars.
Can you imagine what the police officer (our informant believes it's a woman?) would say to the duty sergeant?
brown dog suddenly came out in front of me and I swerved to miss him'.
Or 'I was following a suspect who tip-toed across the concrete and gave pursuit.'
2) Funny Police Picture - Bike in Concrete
It seems that police driving into wet cement is not confined to America. Here is UK patrolman on his way to a 999 (911) emergency call when he got stuck in the setting concrete. Passers-by were too creased up with laughter to help. Eventually an AA rescue truck stopped and freed the embarrassed policeman.
A high tech, theft-proof £75,000 [$ 146,000 USD] police car was stolen in Berlin, Germany - after officers left it unlocked with the key in the ignition. The special BMW, which features high-tech surveillance equipment and sophisticated electronic locks and immobilisers to make it theft proof, was the pride of the Berlin police force. It was stolen in the city's Wedding district when two officers jumped out to chase a joy-rider on foot after he had abandoned a stolen car.
The criminal got away and when the officers went back they found the expensive BMW gone.
4b) Police Keep Watch
And later... sleeping policemen
4d) No Good - Police Lose Their Tyres
The Police cars all have their wheels missing - Will and Guy have the funny police pics
4e) Police Round-up Suspects
Looks like the dog's next!
Some police officers are so overweight they can only transport one suspect in their squad cars. Tests found some police vehicles carrying two large officers are within 14 stone of legal weight limits, Will and Guy have learned from the Daily Telegraph. That means they can only carry one suspect in the back of the car and if two people are arrested the officers would have to radio for another vehicle.
Overweight police cars may not be insured if they are involved in an accident and officers could be left open to legal action by suspects injured in an a crash. Officers could also be fined for driving an overloaded vehicle on the roads and there are concerns that the weight burden could affect the handling and stopping distances of patrol cars.
One force, Lothian and Borders, Scotland, has already decided that only one passenger can be carried in the back of some of its vehicles because they are close to legal weight limits. The standard patrol car is a 1.6-litre Ford Focus or a 1.3-litre Vauxhall Astra. As well as police officers they carry computers, cameras, fire extinguishers, stingers, metal road signs and body armour.
Perhaps police forces all over the world should regularly exercise and have their fitness tested.
7) Understatement of the Year - Police Slow
Classic funny police pic.
Thanks to Hugh Muir who writes in The Guardian Diary column about a probationary police officer who found a message requesting him to call a Detective Inspector Dration. The keen, young policeman picked up the phone and asked to speak to D I Dration. (Dydration)
The female police officer reported to the desk sergeant about having no luck with the witness.
'Did you browbeat him, yell at him, and ask him
every question you could come up with?' asked the sergeant.
'I certainly did.'
'And he said, "Yes, dear, you're right," and dozed off!'
Dodge City, Kansas. The police announced a new revolutionary measure to reduce traffic citations in November 2008. Instead of fining motorists convicted of traffic violations, Dodge City Police Department now force the driver to trade-in their car for a dodgem.
'It was like Crocodile Dundee, Brazoria style,' Brazoria Police Chief Neal Longbotham said.
Many car drivers are happy to carry their pets by car; dogs are commonplace as passengers all over the world. Recently, however, Will and Guy have established from 'The Facts' newspaper in Brazoria, Texas, USA that police who stopped William Eric Johnson for performing an illegal u-turn got a mild surprise when they found that the driver was, in fact, a felon wanted for burglary.
What surprised the police even more was the ferocious alligator roaming free in the car: a live alligator some six feet long. They took this photograph of the reptile, at rest, on the rear window ledge.
A warden took the alligator into care, while the police took Johnson into custody.
Come on lads, let's hope the rain stays away
Please send us your funny police pics, especially any funny police cars.