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- 50 Dollars is 50 Dollars
- The American and the Welsh Farmers
- Grandfather in the Ark?
50 Dollars is 50 Dollars
Morris and his wife Esther went to the state fair every year, and every year Morris would say, ‘Esther, I’d like to ride in that helicopter.’
Esther always replied, ‘I know Morris, but that helicopter ride is 50 dollars and 50 dollars is 50 dollars.’
One year Esther and Morris went to the fair, and Morris said ‘
Esther I’m 85 years old. if I
don’t
ride that helicopter, I might never get another chance.’
Esther replied, ‘Morris that helicopter is 50 dollars and 50 dollars is 50 dollars.’
The pilot over heard the couple and said, ‘folks I’ll make you a deal. I’ll take the both of you for a ride; if you can stay quiet for the entire ride and not say a word I won’t
charge you! but if you say one word, it’s
50 dollars.’
Morris and Esther agreed and up they went. the pilot did all kinds of fancy manoeuvres, but not a word was heard. he did his dare devil tricks over and over again, but still not a word.
When they
landed, the pilot turned to Morris and said, ‘by golly, I did everything I could to get you to yell out, but you didn’t
. I’m impressed!’
Morris replied, ‘well I almost said something when Esther fell
out, but, you know, 50 dollars is 50 dollars!’
[Kindly sent in by John Franklin].
The American and the Welsh Farmers
An American
farmer was on holiday in Wales. He could not resist exploring the hill farms north of Aberystwyth. At lunch time he dropped into a pub and fell into easy conversation with a Welsh farmer.
‘How big is your spread?’
, asked the American. ‘Well look you, it’s
about 20 acres he said’
. Only 20 acres the American responded, back in Texas I can get up at sunrise, saddle my horse and ride
all day, when I return at supper time, I’ll be lucky to cover half my farm’. ‘
Dew dew’
, said the Welshman, ‘I once had horse like that, but sent him to the knackers yard.’
Grandfather in the Ark?
My sister’s
eldest boy liked nothing better than to sit on his grandfather’s
knee and have stories read to him. One day after a
story about Noah’s
ark, and how Noah led pairs of animals to the safety of the ark. The little boy asked, ‘Granddad, you are very old, were you in Noah’s
ark?’
Gosh no’
, said Granddad.’
In that case, how come you didn’t
drown when the flood came?’