Funny Mole Picture and Jokes

• Mole - Friend of foe?  Funny mole pictures and jokes
• Mole - Dealing with the pest
• Mole - Jokes
• Famous Mole
• Interesting Facts About Moles
  

'Beware uneven ground due to mole activity'  Picture kindly sent in by Brian Mansell

Dealing with Moles (Extra research by Will and Guy)

It is very difficult to persuade moles to take poisoned bait as they mainly eat
earthworms.  The most common method of control is with moles traps.  To be effective these heavy metal traps have to be viscous.  An unfortunate side-effect is that your pet dog could unearth the
trap and the sharp points and viscous springs could cause a nasty injury to their noses.

One effective, if time consuming method, is wait until you see activity in the mole burrow / tunnel and then bash them over the head with a spade.
Another tactic, depending on where you live, is send for the neighbourhood mole strangler, who in fact may try sonic devices to scare them away.

The natural enemy of the mole is the weasel, investigate
introducing a pair to your garden.  One enduring urban myth or old wives' tale is that moles cannot stand pickled onions in their burrows.

Types of Mole
There are several species of moles,
in the UK we have Talpa europaea and in America they have the genus, Scalopus.   Scalopus aquaticus in the east, Scapanus latimanus in California plus the Star Nosed mole Condylura cristata.
There are also moles in Asia and even South Africa.

Mole Jokes - Have a
Laugh at the Mole's Expense

Thermole - Exploding Mole?

Demoleition - The destruction which moles
bring to your lawn. (Or better the killing of moles)

Molector - Like train-spotter only collecting mole T-shirts, mugs, hmmm especially mugs.

Note 1: The mole is the Patron Saint of Chemistry

(As in 1 mole of magnesium, or a 1 mole solution of caustic soda)

Q: What do you get when you have a Company of moles
acting like idiots in their Citadels?
A: MoleAsses

Note 2:
Company is the collective noun for moles. Also Citadel is the name for lots of
mole burrows. Addendum: In Indian territory, a collection of moles with sharp
haircuts could be known as a Molehawk

Famous Mole

The Wind in the Willows written by Kenneth Grahame, features the animal
characters: 'Toad of Toad hall', Ratty and my favourite, Mole.

Here is an extract from the book which sets the scene:  'Hang spring-cleaning!' said
Mole and bolted out of the house without even waiting to put on his coat. Something up above was calling him imperiously, and he made for the steep little tunnel into the sunlight.

If you have any amusing pictures of moles, other animals or funny signs then do send them to us.

Interesting Facts About Moles

• In the mole kingdom, the males are called boars and the females are
  called sows.  Both genders are solitary outside of the mating season.
  Consequently, it's only in quizzes that you ever see
  the collective noun, a
  'labour of moles', or a 'company of moles'.
• However, you may see a citadel of mole burrows.  Citadel is such a
  splendid name for a collection of mole hillocks and tunnels.  What is
  happening is that each tunnel is owned by a different mole who marks their
  territory with scent.  We can guess from their unusual anatomy, (their
  collar bone is connected directly to the arm bone) that they are doing the
  equivalent of the breast stroke as they clear away soil to make their
  tunnels.
• Moles are insectivores, relatives of the shrew.  Since they expend
  so much energy burrowing, moles need to eat vast quantities of worms, insect
  larvae and slugs.  Because there are over 40 different species of
  moles, thus it's difficult to generalise on the precise diet of the moles in
  your neighbourhood.
• Moleskin has a wonderful velvety texture, I remember my uncle having a
  marvellous moleskin waistcoat, and wondering how many moles it took to make
  the garment.
• Going back much further in history to 1702, moles were responsible for
  the death of King William III (William of Orange).  What happened was
  the king was out riding, and his horse stumbled over a molehill.  Three
  weeks later the king was dead as a result of injuries sustained during his
  fall.A fanciful story? Maybe; but how do you explain William of Orange's enemies,
  the Jacobites raising their glasses and toasting, 'The little gentleman in a
  black velvet suit'.
• One of the funniest made-up names that I have heard
  was Dame Celia Molestrangler, played by Betty Marsden in the 1960s radio
  programme 'Round the Horne'.

Footnote:
Please send us your funny mole pictures, or mole jokes.