Funny Buffalo – Interesting Facts and Stories

• Beware: Water Buffalo
• Know your Buffalo
• Interesting Facts About Buffalo
• The Kiss of Life Chicken Style

Beware: Water Buffalo:

Locals in Hampshire, UK have been told not to approach six missing water buffalo as
- 'They are able to spray dung across large distances'.

The buffalo were last seen in a field in Lower Pennington
Lane, Lymington earlier this week and police believe that the animals were stolen because there was no trail of tell-tale dung at the scene.  According to BBC online a police spokesman said, 'They should not be
approached from behind, as the animals are able to spray dung across large distances.'

The majority of water buffalo are to be found in Asia but have been increasingly used in the UK to produce
speciality milk, cheese and yoghurts.

Beware: More Buffalo

After eight days of backpacking with my wife, we were looking pretty scruffy. One morning she came to breakfast in a baseball cap,
her shoulder length hair sticking out at odd angles.

'Darling,' she said, 'does my hair make me look like a water buffalo?'

I thought for a moment, then said, 'If I tell you the truth, do you promise not
to charge?'

Know your Buffalo

What does the father
buffalo say to his son before he leaves?

What's the difference between a buffalo and a bison?
You can't wash your hands in a buffalo.....

Be a Smart Buffalo

A herd of buffalo can
only move as fast as the slowest buffalo, much like the brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells.

The slowest buffalo are the sick and weak so they die off first, making it possible for
the herd to move at a faster pace. Like the buffalo, the weak, slow brain cells are the ones that are killed off by excessive beer drinking and socializing, making the brain operate faster.

The moral of
the story: Drink more beer, it will make you smarter.

Interesting Facts About Buffalo
and Bison

Buffalo and Bison confusion

Let us start with the USA; the Latin name for this magnificent American icon
is Bison bison.  In North America the word bison, or buffalo refer to the
same animal.

In Europe there is a separate, but closely related species called Bison
bonasus.  Unfortunately this species called the winet, is endangered and
confined to zoos.

Let us now turn to Africa, here we have a buffalo, but it's not only a
different species, but also a separate genus, Syncerus caffer.  In the
south there is a sub species called the Cape Buffalo.

One feature of the African buffalo is the up-turned horns which make them
extremely dangerous to humans.  Can you run at 50 km /hr, 30 mph?
Well these buffalo can reach the speed of a horse, another reason why they are
rated the most deadly animal in Africa.

Lastly, let us turn to Asia where we have the Water Buffalo (Bubalus bubalis).
These are more docile than the African buffalo and can be farmed for their meat,
milk and hide.

To summarise, in Africa we have buffalo goring gung-ho game hunters; in Asia
water buffalo wallowing waiting to be farmed, and in the USA, bison managed by
Native Americans, regaining their former pastures.

Buffalo and Bison - More interesting facts

• Bison are important to many native American tribes.  No mention of bison
  is complete without recall of the terrible slaughter of the herds in the
  nineteenth century.  Fortunately a few wise men preserved 300, and once they
  were re-introduced to former pastures they have had no trouble in
  thriving.
• Bison is a curious word in that the plural is the same as the singular - lots
  of bison.  Buffalo is even more curious because most dictionaries accept
  Buffalos, or Buffalo as the plural.
• The old American 5 cent piece is called the 'Buffalo Nickel'.   The
  1916 double die obverse mint is particularly prized by numismatists.
• Bison are typical of the bovine family; males battle for supremacy of
  the herd.  The males are noticeably larger than the females, however,
  both genders have horns.
• Today the biggest threat to bison is cattle.  Let me explain it has
  become common to cross breed bison with cattle.  If this continues one day
  there will be no pure bison.

Footnote:
Please send us your funny buffalo
pictures, jokes and stories.