Funny Archaeology Jokes
- Funny Archaeological Facts, Jokes, Trivia and Fun
- Our Top Ten Short Jokes from Archaeology
- Archaeological Funnies
- Funny Historical Truths
- Why were the early days of history called the dark ages? Because there were so many knights.
- It appears that shortest war on record was between Zanzibar and Britain in 1896. Zanzibar [now part of Tanzania] surrendered after 38 minutes.
- What kind of lighting did Noah use for the ark? Floodlights and Ark lights
- Which English King invented the fireplace? Alfred the Grate.
- How was the Roman Empire cut in half? With a pair of Caesars.
- I'm desperately trying to establish why kamikaze pilots wore helmets.
- Last words from a general in the American Civil War, 'Nonsense.They couldn't hit an elephant at this dist...............'
- Asked by the court barber how he wanted his hair cut, the king replied, 'In silence.' [From the Philogelos]
- What's the difference between Joan of Arc and a canoe? One is Maid of Orleans and the other is made of wood. [The Victorians enjoyed jokes like this one]
- Wishing to teach his donkey not to eat, a pedant did not offer him any food. When the donkey died of hunger, he said, 'I've had a great loss. Just when he had learned not to eat, he died.' - Dated to the *Philogelos 4th Century CE]
- Archaeologists are fickle. They're always dating other people.
- "Anyone who fails to see the evolutionary link between man and ape has never used the restroom at a Walmart." Mia Dambrigo
- Most mothers tell their daughters to marry doctors... I told mine to marry an archaeologist because the older she gets, the more interested he will be in her.
- Question: What did Richard III say when a planning proposal was submitted for building a car park... Answer: "Over my dead body"
- Two archaeologists were excavating a tomb in Egypt. 1st Archaeologist: I just found another tomb of a mummified pharaoh! 2nd Archaeologist: Are you serious? 1st Archaeologist: No bones about it!
- Q: Why did the archaeologist go bankrupt? A: Because his career was in ruins.
- Q: What do you get in a 5-star pyramid? A: A tomb with a view.
Archaeological Funny TummyThe archaeologist who accidentally ate one of his tools had an upset stomach, not to mention irregular trowel movements.
A Witty and Funny Old Joke from a History Lesson in the USAIn an American history discussion group, Professor Langer was trying to explain how society's ideal of beauty changes with time. 'For example, he said, 'take the 1921 Miss America. She stood five-feet, one-inch tall, weighed 108 pounds and had measurements of 30-25-32. How do you think she'd do in today's version of the contest?' The class fell silent for a moment. Then Freddie piped up, 'Not very well.' 'Why is that?' asked Professor Langer. 'For one thing,' Freddie added, 'She'd be way too old.'
See more funny history jokes »