What are the Commandments?

The question: 'What are the commandments?' is a conundrum.  On
this page we have a simple answer, a modern answer, and also the hillbilly
answer.

What are the Commandments - Factual AnswerWhat are the Commandments?

Few people know what are the Commandments, still fewer obey them.  Here
is an English translation of the original 10 commandments that God gave to
Moses on Mount Horab.

  1. I am the Lord your God; you shall have no other gods before me.
  2. You
    shall not make for yourself an idol.
  3. You shall not make wrongful use
    of the name of your God.
  4. Remember the Sabbath and keep it holy.
  5. Honour your father and mother.
  6. You shall not murder.
  7. You shall not
    commit adultery.
  8. You shall not steal.
  9. You shall not bear false
    witness against your neighbour.
  10. You shall not covet your neighbour's
    wife. You shall not covet anything that belongs to your neighbour.

Sources: The Bible, Exodus chapter 20 verses 2-17,
also chapter 34 verses 11-27.  There are other matching references
in Deuteronomy chapter 5 verses 6-21.

A Modern Version
of The 10 Commandments

Compared with modern legislation, or even the small print in any
contract, the 10 commandments are crystal clear.  Nevertheless,
they benefit from modern treatment especially for those who, while less than
fully committed to modern religious teachings, feel the 10 commandments
have innate worth.

  1. You should not worry, for worry is the most unproductive of all human
    activities.
  2. You should not be fearful, for most of the things we fear
    never come to pass.
  3. You should not cross bridges before you come to
    them, for no one yet has succeeded in accomplishing this.
  4. You should
    face each problem as it comes. You can only handle one at a time anyway.
  5. You should not take problems to bed with you, for they make very poor
    bedfellows.
  6. You should not borrow other people's problems. They can
    better care for them than you can.
  7. You should not try to relive
    yesterday for good or ill, it is forever gone. Concentrate on what is
    happening in your life and be happy now!
  8. You should be a good
    listener, for only when you listen do you hear ideas different from your
    own. It is hard to learn something new when you are talking, and some
    people do know more than you do.
  9. You should not become "bogged down"
    by frustration, for 90% of it is rooted in self-pity and will only
    interfere with positive action.
  10. You should count thy blessings, never
    overlooking the small ones, for a lot of small blessings add up to a big
    one.

Children's Interpretation of the Commandments
Moses went to the top of Mount Cyanide to get the 10 Commandments.

The first commandment was when Eve told Adam to eat the apple.

The seventh commandment is thou shalt not admit adultery.

The Hillbilly 10 CommandmentsWhat are the 10 Commandments?

No page would be complete without a humorous take on 'What are the
Commandments?'.

Here is a Hillbilly view on life's mandates.

  1. Just one God
  2. Put nothin' before God
  3. Watch yer mouth
  4. Git
    yourself to Sunday meetin'
  5. Honor yer Ma & Pa
  6. No killin'
  7. No
    foolin' around with another fellow's gal
  8. Don't take what ain't yers
  9. No tellin' tales or gossipin'
  10. Don't be hankerin' for yer buddy's
    stuff

Seems very reasonable say Will and Guy.

Footnote:
Please send us answer to the question: What Are The Commandments?

See more clean religious jokes and funny
stories:

• Short Christian jokes   •
Clean religious jokes
• Pope jokes   •
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Christ at Rio   •
Funny religious jokes   •
Christian thought for day   •
Story of Hell


What are the commandments?   •
Children's letters to God   •
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