The question: 'What are the commandments?' is a conundrum. On
this page we have a simple answer, a modern answer, and also the hillbilly
Few people know what are the Commandments, still fewer obey them. Here
is an English translation of the original 10 commandments that God gave to
Moses on Mount Horab.
- I am the Lord your God; you shall have no other gods before me.
shall not make for yourself an idol.
- You shall not make wrongful use
of the name of your God.
- Remember the Sabbath and keep it holy.
- Honour your father and mother.
- You shall not murder.
- You shall not
- You shall not steal.
- You shall not bear false
witness against your neighbour.
- You shall not covet your neighbour's
wife. You shall not covet anything that belongs to your neighbour.
Sources: The Bible, Exodus chapter 20 verses 2-17,
also chapter 34 verses 11-27. There are other matching references
in Deuteronomy chapter 5 verses 6-21.
Compared with modern legislation, or even the small print in any
contract, the 10 commandments are crystal clear. Nevertheless,
they benefit from modern treatment especially for those who, while less than
fully committed to modern religious teachings, feel the 10 commandments
have innate worth.
- You should not worry, for worry is the most unproductive of all human
- You should not be fearful, for most of the things we fear
never come to pass.
- You should not cross bridges before you come to
them, for no one yet has succeeded in accomplishing this.
- You should
face each problem as it comes. You can only handle one at a time anyway.
- You should not take problems to bed with you, for they make very poor
- You should not borrow other people's problems. They can
better care for them than you can.
- You should not try to relive
yesterday for good or ill, it is forever gone. Concentrate on what is
happening in your life and be happy now!
- You should be a good
listener, for only when you listen do you hear ideas different from your
own. It is hard to learn something new when you are talking, and some
people do know more than you do.
- You should not become "bogged down"
by frustration, for 90% of it is rooted in self-pity and will only
interfere with positive action.
- You should count thy blessings, never
overlooking the small ones, for a lot of small blessings add up to a big
Children's Interpretation of the Commandments
Moses went to the top of Mount Cyanide to get the 10 Commandments.
The first commandment was when Eve told Adam to eat the apple.
The seventh commandment is thou shalt not admit adultery.
No page would be complete without a humorous take on 'What are the
Here is a Hillbilly view on life's mandates.
- Just one God
- Put nothin' before God
- Watch yer mouth
yourself to Sunday meetin'
- Honor yer Ma & Pa
- No killin'
foolin' around with another fellow's gal
- Don't take what ain't yers
- No tellin' tales or gossipin'
- Don't be hankerin' for yer buddy's
Seems very reasonable say Will and Guy.
Please send us answer to the question: What Are The Commandments?
See more clean religious jokes and funny
• Short Christian jokes •
Clean religious jokes
• Pope jokes •
Funny Church signs
What are the commandments? •
Children's letters to God •